The moment my life changed

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Photo credit: dgali via Photo Pin CC

I was 36 weeks pregnant, due to give birth on or before April 15, 2009 when my water broke. We called our OB/GYN who advised us to go to the hospital immediately.

My husband rushed me to the hospital and during the ride, I could feel labor pains at regular intervals. When we arrived at the Emergency Room at 6:30 a.m., my husband had to leave me to park the car. I was asked to seat on a wheelchair and brought to the Delivery Room. Inside the Delivery Room, as I was lying down waiting for my OB/GYN and my husband, I was being asked all these questions while I was trying to cope with the contractions that were becoming more frequent. Mind you, it was hard to concentrate!

It happened so quick that my OB/GYN almost did not make it!

March 12, 2009, at exactly 7:14 in the morning, I became a mother to a 5.6 pound baby boy. We did not take any birthing or parenthood seminars prior to giving birth so I had no expectations and absolutely no idea how having a baby will change my life but the moment I felt my baby came out and heard his cries, I knew that everything will be different from that day on.

Giving birth, based from my experience, was a “walk in the park”. I guess you can say I was one of the lucky ones.

But breastfeeding and taking care of my baby was not. That’s a reality that new mothers realize during the first or second week of the baby.

My first born, Tristan, came out a month before he was due. From 2.5 kg at birth, he dropped to 2 kg in his first week due to the fact that he was only drinking colostrum for a week and the actual breastmilk came out only after a week. I was just lucky because my pediatrician is a breastfeeding advocate and she taught me everything I needed to learn at that time. My husband was very supportive and would encourage me to continue breastfeeding even if my baby was crying his heart out at 3 in the morning and I felt like crying and giving up.

First time mothers, especially those who have no experience with babies, would feel overwhelmed with the amount of responsibility that having a child entails.  New born babies demand so much time and attention that a new mother would not even have the time to eat properly or even enjoy a 10 minute me-time.  It takes time to get used to the changes a new baby brings to the new parents but once a routine is established, taking care of the baby becomes manageable.

Knowing that you are entirely responsible for caring and raising another individual will make you realize a lot of things.  Some of which I have listed below:

1.  You will think more about the future particularly the future of your child.
 
2. You will learn to become more selfless and would always think about what your child needs before you can even think about your own needs.
 
3.  You would want to give only the best for your family thus making changes to make sure that they are given the best.
 
4.  You will realize that the gift of time is the most important gift you can give your child. 
 
5.  Becoming a parent is hard work, it gets tiring sometimes but a glimpse of a smile makes you forget how tired you are.
 
It is indeed true when they said that when you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.
 
Everyday since the day I became a mother is a challenge.
Everyday since the day I became a mother is a discovery of all the wonderful and not-so-wonderful things about motherhood.
But everyday since I became a mother, I feel blessed and thankful to be given the opportunity to nourish, protect, teach and nurture my children to their full potential.
 

My life may have changed forever but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
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REINVENT..

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The word REINVENT is defined as CHANGING SOMETHING so much that it appears to be entirely new or TAKING UP a very different way of life.

Trials, challenges, difficulties and failures are part of our lives.  Sometimes, we have a hard time letting go of the things that we are used to but in order to move forward, we need to REINVENT OURSELVES.

Reinventing yourself is not about changing into a different person but about making a new and improved version of yourself.  It is about making CHANGES in your life to become a better and more focused individual.

To be more HEALTHY, change your eating habits and make sure that you are IN CHARGE of your health and fitness. It can be as simple as eating more fruits and vegetables and avoiding oily and unhealthy food or checking with a doctor whenever you feel sick or taking the time to exercise or burn those calories.

To take charge of your FINANCES, change the way you handle your money. Find ways to SAVE MORE and SPEND LESS.  Make a realistic plan to save more money and grow the money you have saved. The road to financial freedom is through a thorough and careful planning of your finances and making sure that you are sticking to that plan.

To strengthen your RELATIONSHIPS especially with your spouse and children, MANAGE your time effectively and make sure you spend quality time with them. It is not about the number of hours you spend with them but about the things you do with them given the limited time you have. Quality time with your whole family is important but it is also imperative that you spend some alone time with your spouse and some alone time with your child as well.

To have peace of mind and improve your SPIRITUAL WELL-BEING, PRAY whenever you can, as often as you can. Attend mass regularly, read inspirational books and find the time to share your blessings with others.

To be HAPPY and CONTENT IN LIFE, CHANGE the way you think. Positive thinking is important as well as an appreciative heart. Changing the way you think will also change the way you react to things happening around you. A failure or a rejection will definitely make you unhappy or even depressed but if you stay positive and think instead of the lessons you have learned and the things you can do to improve your situation, it will lead you to a better future.

No matter how old you are or what situation you are in, it is never too late to reinvent yourself.   It will not going to be easy but I am quite sure that once you reach any or all of your goals, IT WILL BE ALL WORTH IT!

When you REINVENT Yourself, you also Rekindle your Passion, Relive your Spirit and Rediscover the meaning of Life…

How I was raised by my mother

My mother recently celebrated her 70th Birthday.  So I find it fitting that I write something about the most important woman in my life.

My mother got married at the age of 22 to my father who is 10 years her senior.  They came from the same province and growing up, my mother came to know my father because her sister married my father’s brother.  Technically, they became family through their siblings.

Nine months after they got married, she gave birth to their first baby boy and for the next six years, three more boys followed. I was born seven years after the last boy.

My mother stayed home for 16 years and during the 60s, 70s and 80s, staying at home to raise the children was a normal thing.   They did it because it was expected of them and working outside the home was not the norm that majority of women  followed.  My mother had help of course,  taking care of four boys and one girl was not an easy task.

During those days, it was quite normal for a family to have more than four kids.. Some even have as many as a dozen!  Mothers back then can find as many help as they wanted but oftentimes, they raised their kids on their own.    It was not easy but they managed.

Nowadays, having  one or two children is sometimes more than enough.   Very seldom will you hear that a couple has more than three.  And those couples who have more than four children are considered as super parents.  Why super parents?   Everything is expensive these days.  Giving birth, immunization, daily expenses. Let us not forget that you can’t just put them in one corner, you have to teach each child, watch over them and make important decisions for them. Sending your child to a school that will provide quality education is not as cheap as before.   Finding help is not as easy as before.  With today’s technology, lifestyle  and work schedule, raising kids have become harder.

Some may wonder how my parents, particularly my mother, did it…  raising five God-fearing children who all have college degrees…

I think its about knowing your priorities and knowing how to balance ones time without sacrificing your time with the most important people in your life – your FAMILY.

Like I mentioned earlier, my mother stayed home for 16 years after getting married.  She devoted all her time to raising her children while taking care of the home and making sure that my father will have a happy and comfortable home to go home to.  She started working when I was two years old but she was always there, she still spent most of her time with me and my brothers.  Her work did not require her to be in the office the whole day, hence, she can easily adjust her day to make sure that before she goes to work, all our needs were taken care of.  I guess we were also lucky because at that time, we live in our ancestral house with my uncle, aunt (my parents’ siblings) and their family and my aunt was a stay-at-home mom who was always there for me and my brothers.

I remember in grade school, my mother never failed to pick up my father from his office every single day.  Some days, she’ll bring us along but to my recollection, they would always go home early, and always together. She also likes bringing me to Central Market in Manila (famous during my time) to buy whatever we needed – food, clothing or anything for our home.  There were no big shopping malls back then and so, if we needed something we went to Central Market or Quiapo.

In high school, my mother and I would often go out on shopping dates.   She would always pick me up from school then we would go to a mall near my father’s office or to our favorite shopping mall in Greenhills.   She would refer to our dates as “window shopping” dates for the reason that we would not always buy but would just check out the items being sold in case we have money to buy them in the future.    If we don’t have a date, I would always go home after school with my friends in tow and my mother, whenever she’s home, would make sure that we are all fed and taken care of.  She was a friend, not just to me, but to my High School friends as well.

Throughout the years, my mother never failed to make her presence known in every aspect of our lives.  She would be actively involved in whatever her children are interested in.  My father was always busy at work but during weekends, he would make up for the lost time.  Sunday was always family day – Church and lunch or dinner out.

I would not deny that my brothers are all Mama’s Boys and I am a Mama’s Girl.  Our mother will always be the most influential person in our lives.  My father would often joke that if ever they get separated, only my 2nd brother would go with him and that is because my 2nd brother would feel sorry for him.

Now that I am a mother, I appreciate more the choices my mother made to make sure that all her children grew up to be responsible individuals.  My brothers and I are not perfect and we will never be but our parents taught us lessons that we hope to impart to our children.   

Lessons on love, devotion, sacrifice and the importance of being present in your children’s lives – no matter how old they may be.

Blogging my way toward my goals

medium_302510560Photo credit:  Blogging Librarian  via Photo Pin  CC

In this day and age, anyone can become a writer or,  thanks to the evolution of technology,  a BLOGGER!

Ever since I discovered the internet in year 2000, I had been interested in blogsites but I was more of a reader than a writer.  And during those days, blogging was more like an online diary of the blogger, documenting the blogger’s thoughts and feelings as well as his/her day to day activities.

Nowadays, Blogging is being used for almost everything: for educational purposes, a tool of business, a guide to improve oneself or to document a person’s journey.   Topics are vast: current events, politics, weddings, babies, motherhood, food, sports, entertainment, religion, photography, fashion, interior design and many more.  The possibilities are just endless.  And each blogger has his or her own reason for blogging.

As for me,  I have mentioned in my earlier post that I am interested to become a Work-at-Home Mom (WAHM).  I want to find suitable work which I can do at home without compromising my time with my family.  And in order to do that, I have to start somewhere and so I decided to start by blogging.

Blogging can help me develop my creative side.  I know that if I put my thoughts into words, I will also be able to learn more about myself as well as focus on my goals because it will help me monitor what I have accomplished and what I still need to accomplish.

I will also be able to determine if I am taking chances I should and I am making the right choices based on the goals I have set at the start of the year.

Blogging will serve as a tool to find what I have been looking for all these years – a sense of fulfillment and an ultimate way to contentment.

Some may question how will I be able to accomplish all these just by blogging.   For me, it is a matter of believing — Believing that blogging my way toward my goals will help me grow, not just as a blogger, but as a mother, a wife and my own person..

I read in one post of Martine De Luna that blogging can help one live meaningfully.  I am still new in the blogging world but I personally believe this.   Through blogging, I will be able to accomplish the reason why I wanted to start blogging anyway – to leave behind lessons I want my children to learn from when the time comes that they need guidance and I am no longer around.

And even if only a few read my posts, I know that I will enjoy blogging because it will help me get my thoughts across.. to the people who matter the most…

Introduction to a WAHMderful life

INTRODUCTION TO A WAHMderful LIFE

At the start of the New Year, I resolved to be more productive and to stop procrastinating.   So I can say I started my year right by attending the WAHMderful Year-Starter Workshop sponsored by Manila Workshops last January 18, 2014.

Working from Home is a concept I have been interested in for some time now but my main problem is how to get started, how to find legitimate work.  I visited a number of sites that offer jobs that I can work on from the confines of my home but between building a profile worth visiting and taking tests to increase my chances to land an online job, I can’t seem to find that one thing that would make me a certified Work-at-Home Mom (WAHM).

When I came across the Manila Workshops post about its WAHM Workshop for January, I immediately looked for someone to go with me to that Workshop.  Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem going on my own but I just want to have someone familiar to share the experience with.  I contacted two of my friends from High School who may want to take part in that seminar and I was fortunate that my friend CJ agreed to register as well.

We arrived at the venue before 10 in the morning with just enough time to relax before the  10am to 4pm Workshop starts.   It  was there when we met one of the organizers, Ms. Ginger Arboleda.

The first speaker for the day was Ms. Martine De Luna who is popularly known as the Dainty Mom .  She first talked about how to get more clients as a WAHM particularly how important a Brand is to set us apart from other WAHMs.    She said that a brand is our core purpose visualized and worded, hence, it is important to know what sets us apart and who we are.    I learned that it is important to define my target audience, identify my unique value, craft a really effective elevator pitch and invest in my brand.  I also learned that to be a successful WAHM, you must not forget the importance of content – the quality of your work.

The second speaker for the day was Ms. Teresa Gumap-as Dumadag.  She started her talk by showing us her favorite quote which goes like this:

“Life is too short to let even one day
be frenzied or frazzled or frittered away.
 
Life is too short not to take the time to do the things
that will hold the most meaning for you.”
 

The second part of the quote is what struck me the most.  We often do things for the sake of doing it that we do not take  into account it’s importance or it’s meaning not just in our lives, but in the lives of our family as well.

This quote somehow made me realize what I already know but have been trying hard to balance at this point in my life.  My family is my Number 1 Priority and with that in mind, any decision I have to make in the future must not be at the expense of my family life, my time with my husband and my kids.

It is also important to only do the things that will produce the results you desire so here enters the 80/20 Rule.  She explained the need to use the 80/20 Rule.  20% of your tasks should achieve 80% of your desired results or in my case, I should choose which 20% of my time builds my family life and my career as a WAHM.

I also learned the two Time Management Secrets – Managing your time based on priorities and Managing your time based on clearly defined goals.   If you know your priorities and your personal mission statement, you will be able to manage your time effectively and produce your desired results.

In the course of the Workshop,  we were also made to answer a few sheets of paper listing down our priorities, our usual daily activities, our key roles and relationships and tribute statements and action points for each and our 2014 Action Plan.  It was like making my New Year’s Resolutions for 2014 but more specific.  I cannot remember the last time I wrote my New Year’s Resolutions and  the Workshop made me realize that I need to start doing it every year to stay focused and  on track.

When the WAHM Year-Starter Workshop ended, the women who participated in it went home inspired and in high spirits.  I must say I did not really know what to expect when I signed up for the workshop but the WAHM Year-Starter Workshop made me realize that creating a home and building my career without sacrificing family time is possible as evidenced by other successful WAHMs out there, particularly the organizer and the speakers of the event.  It was indeed a WAHMderful experience!


For those who are curious about WAHM,  visit the sites below.  Manila Workshops have a lot of workshops to choose from and it is  not  only for those who want to be WAHMs so check it out!

Manila Workshops 
Martine de Luna
Ms. Teresa Gumap-as Dumadag

wahmderful life

The 3Cs of Life…

3Cs

For the longest time, I have been contemplating on starting a blog to document my journey as a mother – and I must point out that it is a journey worth taking.  I have two children, a kindergartner and a toddler, who are my life and the source of my happiness.

As mothers, we are faced with CHOICES, CHANCES and CHANGES every single minute of everyday.

When a woman becomes a mother,  she will always consider the effect her choices will have on her children and will always choose what she thinks is best for them.

Motherhood changed my priorities, my beliefs, basically how I live my life.

When I was still single, I can go out anytime I want, go anywhere I want to, buy anything I desire, make my own decisions because I am not accountable to anyone (except my parents and boyfriend ), in short, I had freedom to do what I wanted to without regard for the consequences.

Now that I am a wife and a mother, I have to always consider my husband and my children because every Choice I make and every Chance I take will not only Change my life but the lives of my family as well.

This blog is about the 3Cs of my life, particularly my life as a mother.

Welcome to my Blog!

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